NK Podcast: Leading H.E.R. Way

08: The Art of Balancing Family and Business for Mom Entrepreneurs with Cynthia Vanadium

June 01, 2023 Nikisha King | Confidence Coach Season 1 Episode 8
08: The Art of Balancing Family and Business for Mom Entrepreneurs with Cynthia Vanadium
NK Podcast: Leading H.E.R. Way
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NK Podcast: Leading H.E.R. Way
08: The Art of Balancing Family and Business for Mom Entrepreneurs with Cynthia Vanadium
Jun 01, 2023 Season 1 Episode 8
Nikisha King | Confidence Coach

Are you struggling to juggle work and family life as a mom entrepreneur? Join me as I chat with Cynthia Vanadium, a supermom of four, businesswoman, and owner of a Montessori school and counseling center. Discover how Cynthia has mastered the art of balancing her work and family life and her secret behind a productive morning routine that sets the stage for success.

Together, we explore Cynthia's journey in raising four children under the age of five while operating two thriving businesses. She opens up about her unique experience of working alongside her daughter and the challenges that come with that. Gain valuable insights on prioritizing family and work responsibilities and how to set realistic expectations for yourself as a busy mompreneur.

Lastly, we dive into Cynthia's decision-making process during the COVID-19 pandemic and the challenges of operating a childcare facility amidst the chaos. She shares her gutsy approach to being the exception to the rule and her wisdom on investing in oneself. Listen in and be inspired by Cynthia's story as she shares practical tips and invaluable advice on achieving the perfect balance in work and family life as a mom entrepreneur.

How can you connect with Cynthia Vanadium:

And for those navigating the maze of business ventures alone, I'm extending a personal and FREE invitation for one-on-one mentorship.

Today, choose to bring ONE challenge to our meeting, and let's pursue a brand of growth that satisfies you and brings you joy.

Schedule your Free Call Today by Clicking Here

Let's Connect - Follow Me:

Please Subscribe, and Rate ⭐️ the show to help us spread abundance in our small business world.

Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Are you struggling to juggle work and family life as a mom entrepreneur? Join me as I chat with Cynthia Vanadium, a supermom of four, businesswoman, and owner of a Montessori school and counseling center. Discover how Cynthia has mastered the art of balancing her work and family life and her secret behind a productive morning routine that sets the stage for success.

Together, we explore Cynthia's journey in raising four children under the age of five while operating two thriving businesses. She opens up about her unique experience of working alongside her daughter and the challenges that come with that. Gain valuable insights on prioritizing family and work responsibilities and how to set realistic expectations for yourself as a busy mompreneur.

Lastly, we dive into Cynthia's decision-making process during the COVID-19 pandemic and the challenges of operating a childcare facility amidst the chaos. She shares her gutsy approach to being the exception to the rule and her wisdom on investing in oneself. Listen in and be inspired by Cynthia's story as she shares practical tips and invaluable advice on achieving the perfect balance in work and family life as a mom entrepreneur.

How can you connect with Cynthia Vanadium:

And for those navigating the maze of business ventures alone, I'm extending a personal and FREE invitation for one-on-one mentorship.

Today, choose to bring ONE challenge to our meeting, and let's pursue a brand of growth that satisfies you and brings you joy.

Schedule your Free Call Today by Clicking Here

Let's Connect - Follow Me:

Please Subscribe, and Rate ⭐️ the show to help us spread abundance in our small business world.

You're listening to Nikisha King podcast leading her Way, episode eight. Hello, gorgeous. It's Nikisha King Hida, your certified coach and host of Nikisha King podcast leading her way. This is a space for new and seasoned women entrepreneurs who are tied of struggling and doing the entrepreneur journey alone.

If you are looking for support strategies, An actionable step to help you scale your business to high six figures and grow your team then Welcome home. Join my guest and me every other Thursday for Business Class Thursdays. We're here to help you feel heard, evolve, and realize how resilient you are.

Hello and welcome to Nikisha King podcast leading her way. Today my guest is Cynthia Van. She's a mom of four, a business woman who owns a Montesi school and also a counseling center. She is dynamic. Cynthia and I met at a woman's conference like six years ago. And it's so funny because she doesn't love going to women only conferences.

She's very diverse. She's very non-gender, so the fact that she was there meant so much because when we met, it was our time to meet. Cynthia, thank you so much for joining me on Leading Her Way podcast. I'm happy to have you, and I'm so excited to learn from you. Tips and tricks or actionable steps for our moms who are entrepreneurs.

I know they have this term out in the world called Entrepreneur, and that's a great term. But I feel like sometimes it takes away from the value of who you are as a businesswoman, as a person who actually is working and building a team, and building a brand in a community, especially as a school director.

So where we're gonna start today is, I'm gonna get right into it and I'm gonna ask you. How do you deal with four kids under the age of six, or even under the age of five, especially when you're getting ready, like your morning routine? Like what does that look like? Because when I had two kids and I was working from home, I didn't go out.

I felt like I couldn't do it. I felt like, oh my God, I'm just. Stuck, but you have four kids and I know every time you do anything, one is always with you who's like young and can't go to your school. So we're gonna start off with your morning routine. What does that look like for you? First of all, Naisha, thank you so much for having me and I'm truly excited to talk about routine.

Routine is very important for me. You know me very well, and I am a person that needs structure and routine because I have. So many thoughts and ideas that are all over the place. I am a very big on vision and as a result, I am grateful for items, things, tips, and tricks that ground me so that I can be more successful and and naturally meeting you has been a big part of that as well.

So morning routine, every person is different. However, for me, I've learned that rule of thumb is with every child that comes into my wonderful family that's added to the family. I wake up half an hour earlier and some people might say, that sounds a little crazy, right? And it doesn't have to be. It could be very different.

I'm just going to express what I do in case that could be a a point of reference and help for someone else so that they can adapt that. Into their own lives, and that can look very different or it can look similar. We're all, you know, we all take very differently. For me, my strength is disciplined, but one of my biggest challenges is organization.

I, I'm very disciplined, however, to organize things and to keep them intact, to execute. I'm very restless and I, I'm, I'm mean, highly. I'm very impatient. So I, I just want to do, so I normally wake up between four 30 and five in the morning. And that is as of now, cuz I have child number four. And so what I mean by that is I have a 10 week old, naturally I'm not sleeping eight hours a day.

And so I always talk to people and I say, identify what amount of hour you feel rest with. I mean, it's not gonna be perfect, right? Right. For me, my magical number is six hours. That's for me, eight hours. I feel groggy, but that's just what works for me. So when I wake up at four 30 in the morning, I know we spoke a little bit about this in the past, is I wanna wake up at four 30 because I know my eldest is going to be up by five 30 in the dot.

So in that hour, I wanna, I want to fit in, I'm not even gonna say squeeze fit in a non rushed shower so that I could regroup and really identify. Were just three things that I. Want to work on today. In the past, as you know, me, Nikisha, I used to have like a list of things. All these things I wanted to do never went past like number four, but so I thought, why even bother, right?

So let's identify three things that I want to do. I. It tends to do with two things for the business, it should be probably reverse and one important thing for my family. Mm-hmm. So that's how I created everybody could be different, it could be just three things for your family that's perfectly fine, or you know, vice versa.

But for me it's two things. And, and let's be, let's be also sincere here. I, it's two businesses, so it's really one thing for each business and one thing for the family, right. And to identify those three important things that I need to tackle for the day. Whatever that might be. Once I identify that I, what works for me, I need to document things, if not out of sight, out of mind, right?

I will write that on my phone and my calendar. Not a specific time, but just at the top, just so that I could always see it. And, and then from there, I, I will stop showering and then my routine starts with the kids, meaning I actually make breakfast every morning. Some people think I'm crazy for them. So I will have breakfast.

Their close husband laid out the night before. All of the kids have already bathed the night before, so we're just brushing teeth using potty. Yes, I'm using the P word using potty and making sure everyone is getting ready by the time they're getting ready. I have a five and a half year old, four year old, two and a half year old, and a 10 week old.

The first two could dress themselves. The third one needs a little bit of help, and naturally the infant, of course, needs all the help. Right. So I am done with all the eggs. I make eight eggs a day in the morning, and I'm done with all the eggs and all the pancakes. Everything is served. They sit down, they eat, they already know they have to have the house cleaned up in the morning.

We get ready to go to school by 8:00 AM and so this is happening from four 30. To about seven 30 unwinding 8:00 AM every day we leave. And so when I had my first, I felt stuck in the house until 1:00 PM no matter what I did, what routines I had, I always left at one in the afternoon. So I absolutely empathize.

If anything, I feel that I've become stronger at this with more pressure with every child. I'm like, faster, faster, faster. So please, to all the moms that are entrepreneurs, they should not be discouraged. If anything, just modify and fine tuning because it is trial and error. So hopefully that could be somewhat helpful to some mothers that are entrepreneurs as well.

I think you made so many valid points because. One, when you had one kid, I feel like your one kid is your beta program. Yes. That is where you're going to learn how to get better. As you grow. Correct. So one kid you felt like you couldn't make it out by 1:00 PM but with four kids you could make it out at eight.

Everyone has breakfast. Use the bathroom, brush your teeth, right, like four. You're like, oh, this is my magical number. Right? Where some people who are listening to, it's like I have one or two kids and I can't make it out by 8:00 AM Right? And that's so interesting. And the other factor is that you made the choice, cuz I believe in decision you made the choice to wake up at four 30.

Correct. To give yourself me time so that at five 30 you could become their mom, you become correct. The person they require and need and, and they will take all of whatever they want from you without asking. So you became that at five 30, but you had your time. Yes, and I recall when I had my first daughter, it felt like I could never take a shower.

It felt like I had no time because there was no one telling me, Nikisha just wake up 30 minutes earlier and take a shower. It never even dawned on me to do anything like that, maybe to other people, but when I was in it, There was no, that was not an option because I was just drowning in the, it's very real though.

Nikisha. It's very real. I say this because with my first I'm, I felt all those emotions you're talking about, it's a complete change of life. You are immersed in a new role that you don't know what to expect, what's expected from you. All I remember is I need to make sure my son is breathing when he's sleeping because I don't know if they're breathing or Notre, I remember looking at his chest.

Yes, my 10 week old is lucky if I check in on her for 30 minutes. I mean, so, but, but I did it for the first. Five weeks, you're just a lot more pragmatic objective. You, you know, that's not your first rodeo, so it's not like you're a neglectful. You just, there's a lot lower neuroticism. I mean, I think neuroticism is important when you're a new mama because it plays a role for you to be present with your child who's an infant, but it also could be very crippling as a new mom.

Because now you feel like you're drowning and it's very real. So how do we not reject the emotion of drowning and instead redirect it? Right. I think if there's One of the things that you know best of me is don't try to not feel anxious. Don't try not to feel nervous. Use that energy and redirect it into something that is useful to you.

Right, right. And even saying that, right, because sometimes some people go, well, what, what does that even look like? How do you, how do you take the energy you feel like if you're drowning and redirect it? What? What does that look like for you, Cynthia? When you feel a certain way and you have to like now use it and reframe it so we can work in your favor.

That's a very good question, right? Like what does that process look like? So a quick example, a few weeks ago, we had a very bad situation. I no longer see it as a bad situation, like I would six years ago, but you were aware of this. We had water pipe burst at the school, and if it was me six years ago, I probably would've gone to a corner of a room, had a good cry for two minutes, then got it out of my system, and now responded to it.

When I heard that, I went immediate into, okay, let's prioritize what's important and let's make sure that everyone's safe. Everyone's safe out the building. Great. Okay. There's still watering coming out. All right, so let's make sure that the valves are closed. Main valve are closed. Excellent. And so what it looks like is that I have to bring myself, even if it's for a couple of seconds to just pause, breathe, assess.

And respond to myself, like if somebody else was asking for advice, if that makes any sense. So I always say, and you could say it out loud, if a person is in a, in a position of that they feel in a, a very, in a, in a really poor or or bad rut, what would you tell yourself? If some, what would you, sorry. What would you tell to another person that is expressing to you that they're feeling in a bad place?

What questions would you ask them? So make efforts in those couple of seconds or minutes to respond those questions to yourself. So you really wanna make efforts to truly, like you said, reframe and really reframe your mindset. I know you and I speak about that a lot, but we are the stories we tell ourselves.

So if I tell myself the story that, that I'm doomed because a water piper, I said, then I am doomed. Then that's it. Then we know the answer. But if I tell myself, okay, this is a really bad situation yet I want to make sure I'm gonna focus on everybody being safe and now make efforts to correct, provide corrective action, then I'm gonna do that.

Emotions are amazing, and I'm not saying to reject the emotion, but you're able to turn down the volume and the emotion that doesn't serve you. That's a really good point about. And I feel like emotions come from the way we think and the thoughts and the stories we're telling ourselves. Correct. Right.

Because based on what the situation that happened to you with the pipes that happened to you six years ago, and like you said, you would've been in a corner crying. That emotion might have felt o overwhelming, but you had a thought. Your thought could have been, I have no money for this. Your thought could have been, oh my God, how is this even happening?

And we have this many kids with us, right? Mm-hmm. Where today when that happened, your thought was, we gotta get this fixed, let's go. Correct. Get the kids out, right? You start strategizing, you start moving because you're just thinking something different. Like it. It doesn't matter what it costs. Today, what matters is we have to get the kids in a safe space, and then we have to get it functioning right, because you're doing other things as well.

Now, let me ask you this. That's for business related, but what does it look like when it's mommy related? How does it look when your kids, all for them are at your feet? And they are just telling you that's every day. Exactly. What do you tell yourself then, and what do you do for that mom who's like, yeah, I don't, I don't know how to work with that.

That is such a great question. I think that's more of a struggle than the business water pipes because, because they're persistent and, and it's constant. Right, right. I think of anything, my, my kudos goes out there to the home. The mommy's at home. Because, wow, that is R That is tough work. Let me tell you.

I mean, I'm with them for four hours a day. I'm grateful that I'm with them for four hours a day. I mean, hey look, no judgment here. How many hours are they? Your babies? I love them dearly, but. I'm, I'm going, as you know, I'm gonna start a new journey. I'm gonna be with them all day, every day, coming up soon.

That's gonna be a part two we're gonna have to do. So, um, that sure is. With that said, I make full efforts and I really, am I not saying because a little bit of yelling does come out here and there. Do not raise my boys for the simple reason that it doesn't really do anything. It's, if anything, it's just me.

It's just doing something for me. It's me, you know, not being able to manage the frustration I have, because four little people are asking for the, for different things all at once. I mean, my, my biggest thing, and I know, you know this is gonna be probably funny or not funny, is please just don't use the patio all at once.

I, I, I only have two hands. Why do you guys have to be in sync with your potty? Using, like, seriously, we don't even have three bathrooms. But pull-ups apparently are great for the young, the second youngest, right? And then the other two. And my eldest, who's a perfectionist, wants to make sure he cleans himself correctly.

So he just wants me to be a supervisor, so I'm so funny. Why? Why do we need this? I'm like, you're fine. Just shower if you're not con, you know? And then you don't wanna start other things there, but, So he, his whole thing is that he showers every time he potties out. But with, so I say this because it's something so simple, but my toughest times are bath time.

They are actually very good listeners, but it's the fact of so many different needs and wants just for the simple experience of bath time. And they have so many different routines within themselves. They have little personalities, so they have their own agenda and you're like, I just want you in and out.

Without soap. So with that said, it really is about making efforts to keep myself. Present in the moment to be intact. I don't have a phone around my kids. That's my number one thing, not a judgment call for anyone else that does. But I learned the hard way. I was trying to do an email once it was urgent, giving somebody a bath.

It went of course in a bathtub. After that, I'm like, okay, I'm not doing this. And not only that, I mean they will, only the little ones will only yell out your name more when you're not looking at them. True. And so, I have mom guilt that comes into play all the time. Am I, am I carrying them enough? Am I enough?

Am I present enough with them? The answer is probably no, because there's four and then there's two businesses. But I am very, very big on being present for the important pieces, which is dinnertime. Bath time and morning routines. And for those I will look at my phone periodically and I mean like I usually have certain times, and you probably know this because I usually will message you if there's like a question or something post everyone going to sleep like around 8:30 PM That's usually the time I do look at my phone or before I start evening routines around five 30.

I'm with them, all of them by six. And so I will look pre periodically at that, but if it's not urgent, it could wait. If it's not water pipes bursting, it could wait. And that's my level of urgency, right? An email could wait a respond to, someone could wait. They could wait the two hours unless it's urgent.

And you have to assess that. You have to identify what is important, what is urgent. I love quadrants. Even though I'm not the most organized, I love the idea of it. So I like to attack the urgent important. Always the issue with that, right, not to deviate so much, is that I never get to the minutiae, right?

I never get to the emails or the, or the non-important tasks that are so equally important to not also become a snowball. So I'm very cognizant that I am present for the important urgent. So if you as a person, as a mom, as an entrepreneur, are able to assess the important urgent while of course keeping the other tasks that need to be done at Bay, I think that's, that's really key too, to be able to stay in tune with your family, if that makes sense.

It does. It's like focusing on what's. Urgent and important, or just things that are required of you correct. To make sure you can keep moving forward? When I was in business when I was younger, I don't recall having any of, I was doing business. I did have a client or two, but it was a challenge because I don't even think I sat down to prioritize what was important.

I didn't make a plan of what was important. Sometimes those are some of the things I feel that hinder us. That's the story we're telling ourselves, right? Because when I was in the moment, the transition was hard to become a mom. Go from a business woman working to now I'm a mom and I still had that business.

I wasn't working anymore, but working. When you start working young, it becomes your identity. So when you leave that from motherhood, You're kind of still stuck in that identity cuz now that's all you've known and now you're like, I'm a mom. What's that? You know what I mean? And this is not work I wanna do.

I didn't sign up for this. I don't wanna clean anybody. I don't want to hear no crying. I didn't sign up for this. Right. So it's such a valid point of what you're sharing and how you managed and did it. Another question I have for you. When you had your kids, I remember when I met you, you only had your son and then you had your daughter.

And I remember you'll be working and your daughter will be with you. And this has been your story for the last couple of years. Cause every time a new kid come into the picture, they're too young to go to the school. So they would stay with you for maybe six months or so. Can you share with our audience, like how is that even possible?

I must say I feel a little bit better now doing it. I have more of a routine for that too. Right. I, I mean, I've used bank tables as my changing station. I have no shame, right? You need to change your kid. You need to change your kid. I felt uncomfortable doing it in the car seat. Now I, now I go to the car.

Now I feel a little bit more, more apt, more capable of changing them in my life as well. But mom, I needed a steady. Steady flat table. I'm like, Nope, it cannot have cushion. I make sure that nothing gets anywhere. So I remember it was my first bank meeting for the Montessori school and I said, do you guys have a changing station?

Because you know, I needed something, I needed my needs met. They're like, no. Like usually babies don't come here with me with the carrots. And as I, I said, oh, I said, well, I said, I have a changing pad. I'm gonna be using this when we're done. Just so you know, I've learned to not ask. I state what I want. I think that's been the most helpful for me with a, with a child.

I go to the gym with my child. Apparently there's a policy that you're not supposed to bring babies. I don't ask, and I'm not saying you're there to break rules. That's not the goal here. The goal is that certain things should be the exception. I'm saying that if you are going to succeed in business and in your family, you're gonna need to be the exception of for some roles, and that sounds a bit arrogant and I'm okay with that.

It goes back to your point. I real, I truly don't, I'm not concerned. It's not my business what people think of me. I'm here to do, I'm here to provide for my family and I'm here to lead. My team in a, in a functional business, because the way I see, and I know I'm deviating a bit, but the way I view it is if I have a strong team that's taking care of my business, I need to make sure that I'm a strong lead that is going to have a.

The funds to properly compensate them. I don't view the number 10 teammates. I view it as 10 families are dependent on this. Right. And so my, exactly. My vision is very different. So kind of coming for full circle, I want to make sure that when my child is with me, I take those little. It's five to 10 minute breaks in between meetings to hold them to be present with them.

And normally now with number four, I know exactly, I've already has have her pretty much sleep trained at Tenn weeks old because she's number four, so I know exactly when her naps are. So I, I actually schedule meetings for, for those times, so she's actually sleeping and naturally it's not gonna be perfect, but I feel a lot stronger with my gauge of.

My daughter snaps, and so I'll have meetings. I will also take her to meetings where she is sleeping and I've gotten her, also used to noise very, very young. I mean, she's only 10 weeks, I feel like I'm talking about three year olds. But since birth, she's been around noise, right? And going to meetings with me, right?

So she could sleep through 10 people talking and that's. Ideal. So I guess any sort of small little takeaways from this is exposing your little one to noise early on and allowing them to view, to experience noise as really as in a way, as a sound machine, right as noise, that like white noise. And then secondly, also making sure that you don't set an expectation of what the day needs to look like.

That's really important. You have already your three identify tasks or goals for the day. How you get there is going to vary day by day, and it's not going to be perfect and it's not gonna be intact. And you might have poop in your hand by midday, but you have to wash it off and you have to keep pushing, right?

So, Those are the things is I think we truly tend to feel like we fail because we set these expectations and we don't meet them. When in reality you could still reach the end goal, not in the manner you thought of it, of how it was going to go. If that makes sense. That makes a lot of sense because the expectations we put upon ourselves is where disappointment does come in play.

Correct. So in other words, if you're going, you have your three things that you would like to complete. And that's what you do. You create just three and you work on those and if they don't get done, you let it go for tomorrow and that's it. But if you have expectations that they should be done, then that where, that's where the challenge does come in.

That's where we do fight with ourselves a lot more. I love the fact that this is so good for our show leading her way, right? You lead your way. You a, you don't ask, I need to change your soul since you guys in a bank for some reason don't have changing rooms in your restroom because somehow you don't think kids come in the 2023 era or 2022.

We still need something to do what I need to do because I, this is just what needs to get done. And as you said, you got better going in a car, but still. You just do what you need to do. You, you do that and then they can let you know, right. Like the gym, if kids are not allowed, they'll let you know when you bring your kid in and you work it out that way.

Correct. That's that's a really good point cuz being young or being a mom, and I wasn't too young. I was 31 when I had my first daughter. It was just this. I didn't hardly even go anywhere. I didn't personally, but I didn't go anywhere cuz I was in transition mode. There was no motivation, there was no feeling of anything.

Here's what I'm gonna ask you because we know you own a school and you own a a counseling center, and that's what I had forgot to mention. You have two businesses and so Yes. Everyone, she has two businesses, not one, and she still manages four kids, like so good. Some people who do nine to five who go to work in a corporate.

Mm-hmm. Wherever they work, they are usually motivated. And that's why they go to work. They're motivated for their family. They will always tell you, I do this for my family. And half of the times they're not present. They sometimes they're not able to be key cuz they're focused on this work and what's the, what's re required of them.

I feel like as a business owner, sometimes I can slack off, right? Like, and sometimes I slack off because I don't have a team of 10. Like you said, you don't have like team members. You have 10 families you're responsible for. Right? And that's a big weight. What keeps you motivated for your family? What are some of the things, and I feel like your family is bigger than your kids and your husband, cuz you have a team members, correct?

Right. Yes. Let's talk about Covid. When covid happened, the world was closing down. You are a, you had your school, this is contact that was, there was some things you had to do or things that kept you motivated. I want you to tell everyone about that experience for you because PE schools did close down.

But somehow you, you kept pushing through. I want you to share that with everyone. I think that's a such a strong point. It's like trauma, right? Talking about trauma covid was, oh, that was interesting in hindsight, now that I think about that. Full transparency also for our audience. I did crisis counseling for many years, for about 16 years.

So Joe, I don't wanna kind of walk in and pretend like, you know, I didn't have that background to begin with. But now it goes back to how do I apply those scales onto my businesses and how do I apply those scales for my family? So covid, I still remember because it truly is like light bulb imprint. What we learn of trauma-based, you know, focused here is it's very, very vivid.

So I remember notice were given two days before my husband's birthday. His birthday's March 25th. That we had to close schools down. Most schools already started closing March 15th, 2020. And we were given until the 23rd, I think it was Thursday or Friday. And so I remember the governor was speaking and said, well, to schools and childcare facilities you could apply to become an emergency center and say, open.

All I heard from that message, that's one thing. It's a good thing and a bad thing. I skim words and I kind of, I kind of listen to what, what's gonna benefit me. All I heard. You could stay open. So I said, all right, well I don't, I don't like to be told not to do something because I want the option. And so I said, all right, well we're applying for this.

So it was a couple of days before my husband's birthday and we didn't know a lot, you know, and it's never to get politically, so I'll be very mindful here on keeping that down. But we didn't know how severe then it was very unknown. There was just a lot of unknown. So my husband's natural reaction was, I don't know if I want you to be around anybody because, or my children around anybody because we, we just don't have enough information, and my immediate response was the following, not knowing any rules, not knowing what it entailed was only because I am certified to stay open doesn't mean I have to open.

It just means I have the option. And he kind of looked at me like, wow, like you blew my mind. Because he tend to be the logical, very, you know, pragmatic person who thinks of all of the holes in the bucket. And then he's like, I never even thought about that. I said, exactly what makes you think that we have to do something?

I just want to make sure I have the option to do something. They said they're gonna close for two weeks. We know how that went. So, yes, so. In this state of New Jersey and I, you know, once again, clause here, I cannot deny nor confirm you. This is accurate information. Approximately, there is approximately 2100 childcare facilities in the state of New Jersey.

Out of that number, there were, oh, there were a beginning number within the first six weeks because we were closed for about six months if you were not certified, about 76 inches that closed down. It is very unlikely for a business to be closed past four weeks. Most businesses, unfortunately, operate in a very minimal cash flow, meaning they don't really have an intact emergency fund, and it's not at any, it's not pointing fingers, it's not a judgment call.

It's just that is what is. So nobody was planning to be closed for six months, right? First of all, even if you sa were the, you were the best saver. You couldn't keep on paying bills for six months. You couldn't keep on paying staff for six months. And so what occurred was we were actually close to two weeks.

Once again, I did not ask permission. We closed for two weeks. April 3rd came and my co-owner said, well, we didn't get a notice to open. I said, we don't need to get a notice. I signed up to be a certified center. They're like, you did a good confirmation. Okay, well somebody could come and knock on my door and tell me if I'm confirmed or not.

So on April 3rd we opened and we stayed open throughout, and that was that. Now how now and and that happening, what motivated you? What was behind that? I know one was option. I love my options, but why did you need to do it? I needed to do that be, first of all, because we did not have enough information of what was happening.

And while my kneejerk reaction was stay away from people because we don't know what's happening was, well, what if it's a lot? And I really wanna tap into how I was thinking because I was a lot more scared then. Well, what if there needs to be a place when there's no kids to go to? You know, or, or there's, or now people need to work.

And so naturally that was not something I thought on my own, the seed was planted that these emergency centers were gonna be for, for children predominantly, which was called emergency responders. So I thought, where are those little people are gonna go? Are they gonna stay home alone? And then of course, my husband's like, well, that's not your problem.

You think about your home kids. Right? And, and he's not wrong. He's not wrong. But once again, I don't have to be there if things worsen, but if things calm down, I'm so happy that we could be there if that's possible. So that's really what motivated me was the what if things get better. Right. Right. Yeah.

And if they do get better, you're open for people who are first responders. Correct. The people. And you do have parents who were first responders because at that time you did have kids come to your center. Correct you, you did have business. I actually read the whole whatever documentation, I forgot what it's called.

I tried to erase those pieces for my brain is I read the whole addendum and it, and it's interesting, it was not catered just to first responders. It was catered to anyone that was viewed as. Necessary. I don't really like that term because everyone's necessary for their family. We know that, but was viewed as integral part of the functioning of society, and under that was certain business owners.

Mm-hmm. So fortunately, Most of the parents that attended my school were either IRS lawyers, where lawyers in general, restaurant owners, business owners, contractors. So those are all integral to society, right? So because of that, I had the justification that I was already in a position to, to want to be able to cater to my present.

Families, so that allowed me to make a judgment call. Another thing that's important to to mention is I had a very hard time listening to my gut six years ago. I would question myself. It's, and it's not a judgment call to anyone else. I think people should, you know, analyze things, assess things. One thing that I have done with me is I take seconds.

If any minutes to make a judgment call and I just run with it, it's not gonna be perfect, but I will adapt along the way. And I, and that's how I've been doing things for the past four years and, and so far. Okay. And it's not perfect, right? But I have learned in business, you really, and as a parent, you really.

Could have further consequences if you take too long to make a judgment call for important pieces, right? The urgent pieces like the water pipes, right? Or covid, and we got that application right away. Naturally, then people started jumping on and some people did get denied. There wasn't enough, there weren't enough applications in already.

So you want to jump on that just to have the option? And you don't have to take it. That's such a great point, Cynthia. There's so much I've learned from you in this conversation. You know, in regards to. Being a mom of four kids under five and a half and setting time to yourself just by waking up an hour, 30 minutes earlier than normal, right?

Having that continuous some form of a schedule, cuz you know your oldest is gonna wake up at five 30. That's just what it is, right? Mm-hmm. Also, the fact of during Covid knowing you were one of the emergency centers for kids, and some people could say, well, yeah, that's like a, a financial decision, but for you, it wasn't, it wasn't about making the money, staying in business.

It was like, how can I open my doors? To the families we serve, that if they have to go out, their little ones have a safe place to come to a place that they know very well the team members that can come in and cater to them. And I usually want people to get that when they listening to leading her way.

We are here as business owners, not for the money. That is the special treat we get, but the value. How do we show up for other people? How do we be present for our family? How do we present for our team members and our customers and our clients, how do we give to them so they can grow in their own way?

And that's what you did when you gave that emergency center for those kids. You allow these families to go out, give value, to make money, to take care of their kids, and to pay you and. Sometimes as business owners, I think we get so wrapped up in ourselves, we forget to serve our community. So thank you for even reminding us about that.

And there'll be many more times. We're gonna have more conversations because the next one I wanna get into with you is how did you get over your fear when you started this school? Right? There were so many, like you said, six years ago, you were not making decisions, you were indecisive, you were not sure what to do, how to do it, where today, Your ability to make a decision is so much quicker, and like you said, I will grow.

I will learn through it. A lot of business owners are so scared to make decisions, hence the reason they're not serving well or not growing, and I think that's a conversation we should have for our business. You know, our business Thursdays, just to understand how that transformation came or, you know, came along, how did it progress?

And it's not like you only focused on business because your family grew too. Everyone, everything grew around you, your family, your team members, your businesses. Everything around you is flourishing, but it, it all started with you and how you see things and how you did things. So we're gonna have that conversation, which is gonna be so good.

But once again, Cynthia, thank you for coming on. Thank you for sharing these tips with our moms who are business owners. I think it's so important for them to get to see the inside of someone else's business and family life so that they can have hope. Because I didn't have this in 2011, and if I did, I might have been further.

But I'm not taking away the journey, the 13 years that I've had. I love everything I went through, but I can only say that because today I'm somewhere different than I was 13 years ago. Right. So I wanted to say thank you. Thank you for joining me. I appreciate it. Do you have any last tips you wanna share?

Any last things you wanna say to our audience? I, I do. I would love to say to our audience to please. Make the efforts to say something nice to yourself in the mornings. Just say something and it's not just to be positive, but say, you know, say something caring and kind to yourself, whether it's mentally or out loud, that makes a true difference for your day.

So if it's, if you could be kind to yourself before you're kind to others, that would, that would really, I think, make a whole lot of difference. So that's my, my little last little snippet. Thank you for that. And it, it means a lot. Yeah. Thank you so much for listening. Everyone. Have a wonderful day. Enjoy your weekend.

And remember, you are so capable of doing anything you make a decision to do. Have a good one. Thank you for investing in you. When you invest in you, everyone around you will benefit. If you had an aha moment in today's episode, hit the follow button to enjoy more aha. But more importantly, if there is someone you know who will truly benefit from this episode, click the three dots and share the link via text or social media.

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